Unconventional Christmas
by HipsterMaybe
Summary: Just a little Christmas present to ya'll! Fun little one shot with some bromance and whump. Happy Holidays! I own nothing but what I came up with.


**So, this is my Christmas present to you all! I'm one hour into a six hour car ride with Mitch and Joe (my brother), so we decided to work together to write you up a little one shot! I honestly have no idea where this is gonna go, but I'm sure my boys will help me make it something awesome! **

**A little FYI, everyone in my family agrees that Adam is bad for Kono and that she and Charlie Fong would be a way better couple. **

"I cannot believe this. The one day I ask off and some psycho has to go on a killing spree. What is it about the holidays that makes people homicidal?" Danny grouched for the hundredth time that day.

"Spoken like a true cynic, Danno. Don't worry, we'll wrap this up before you have to pick up Grace." Steve replied clapping his partner on the shoulder as the stood over the body, or what they at least _assumed_ was a body.

"What do we got, Max?" Chin asked as he and Kono joined their team mates.

"Victim appears to be female. Based on the skull structure, I would say caucasian. Her pelvic bone has spread, indicating that she's given birth. I would estimate her age at around twenty to thirty."

"Do we have cause of death yet?" Steve asked.

"Given the level of mutilation and decomposition, I can't be certain at this juncture. However, I would guess that, based on the wood splinters I found in the area where her heart should be, she may have been stabbed in the chest."

"Excuse me, where her heart _should be_?" Danny asked.

"Yes, it seems that, among other various body parts, the killer decided to take her heart with him."

"Joy." Danny muttered sourly.

"How was she found?" Kono asked.

"A hiker was out here with his dog when it just went nuts and ran over here. Owner starts to dig for whatever the dog is interested in and finds here in a shallow grave. Looks like she's only been down there a few days."

"Did she have anything on her?" Danny asked. Kono shook her head.

"Nah, no clothes, no jewelry, nothing. Killer even took her hair." Danny's face contorted in disgust.

"So, I guess all we can do is look through missing persons until Max matches her dental records." Steve suggested. They all agreed and went back to their cars to drive back to HQ.

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"Helen Ahlers, age thirty." Chin read aloud from the email Max had sent after identifying the remains. "Married to Kevin Ahlers for eight years. They have one child together, Caroline. She's six years old." Danny sighed heavily.

"Have they been notified?" Chin nodded.

"Dukes over there right now." Steve gently bumped Danny's elbow with his own and offered and understanding smile.

"What do we know about her?"

"Pretty much everything. She's your basic soccer mom whose biggest secret is her weekly glass of Chardonnay. She was missing five days before Max estimates her time of death, just like the other victims. Her husband said she went out to go pick up the photos they were having developed at the grocery store, but she never made it there."

"So, we have nine victims now, all within the space of a couple months. Same MO every time. Pretty brunette around thirty. Each one found in a shallow grave. All of them missing their fingers, hair, hearts, and most of their blood." Steve summarized.

"And we have nothing to go on here." Danny remarked.

"Not quite." Said a voice from the doorway. They all turned to see Fong walk in, carrying a sheet of paper.

"Charlie! You found something?" Kono asked enthusiastically. Simultaneously, the three men behind her grinned and quirked an eyebrow. Though her cheeks flushed, she maintained her professional focus.

"Mmmhhhmm, and I think this may be our guy." Charlie said with a smile. "Max called me down after he found what looked like a piece of skin that didn't belong on her scalp. Under a microscope, we found that it was actually the pad of a finger, probably cut off accidentally while our killer was scalping the victim. I took it back to the lab and was able to get a partial print off of it. Turns out it was just enough to make an ID. Meet Colin Harker." He finished triumphantly, handing the file to Steve, who read it aloud .

"Colin Harker, age twenty, expelled for Hawaii Pacific University for stalking his teacher, Mary Ottmar...wait. Wasn't she the first victim? How the hell was this guy not on the suspect list?" Steve asked incredulously.

"He was, but he had an air tight alibi...that I just shattered." Charlie said proudly, fist bumping Kono.

"Nice work." Danny said approvingly.

"It says here that after following her and documenting her actions for six months, Harker broke into her home, put on her husbands clothes, and was playing with her child. Looks like he was trying to fit into her life." Steve continued.

"Creepy." Chin commented.

"So, do we have an address for this guy?" Danny asked, hardly daring to believe their luck.

"Yup. He's got a little cottage way out in Kahuku, about a mile into the forest."

"Well if that just doesn't scream ' psycho stalker killer lair'." Danny deadpanned. Checking their weapons, they nodded to Charlie.

Thanks man, we owe you one. Drinks on me tonight." Steve said with a smile.

"Wallet." Danny demanded, holding out his hand expectantly.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me Steven. Hand it over. You are not going to stick Charlie with the bill. hand it over so I can make sure you don't 'forget' it this time." Steve scowled, but handed his wallet to Danny anyway.

"Fine, but I'm driving."

"Don't you always?" Danny said with a resigned sigh.

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"Nice modest digs." Kono remarked as they took in the immense mansion before them. Apparently the Harker family was very well off and, Colin being the only surviving member, was left with the entire fortune to himself.

"Alright, as much as this sounds like the beginning of every terrible plan from Scooby- Doo, we should split up. We've got a lot of ground to cover and two teams will be faster that one. Everyone stay in radio contact. Questions?" steve asked.

"Nice plan, Fred. Scooby-Doo? Really?" Danny asked.

"What? It's quality television!" Steve defended.

"So this is where you get your detective skills? Figures." Steve just rolled his eyes. After quickly checking their weapons and securing their vests, they entered the house. Chin and Kono immediately went upstairs while Steve and Danny stayed on the main floor. The house was dark save for the lights of the guns. Carefully, they checked every corner, but it looked like the place had been abandoned for decades. One of the doors in the kitchen led to a basement, so they began to descend the stairs. Danny Steve tried to radio Chin to tell them where they were, but all he got was static, sending Danny a dark look, they began to turn back. Suddenly, the door slammed. Try as he might, Steve couldn't get it to budge. He looked back at Danny, his eyes begging his partner to come up with a plan.

"Ruh-Roh." Danny whispered in his best Scooby impression. Then the floor fell out from beneath them and they were falling. The dust settled around them, but neither man moved.

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Steve was the first to come around. Instantly, he was aware of a sharp, stabbing pain in his forearm. He blinked his eyes open, surprised to see that everything was lit by candles set on shelves along the walls. Gingerly, he looked down to see his left arm not only bent at an unnatural angle, but also showing a bit of bone. He groaned, the tore off a strip off his tee shirt and a piece of leather from his belt. He placed the leather in his mouth, counted to three, then set his arm and wrapped the rag around it. The pain was intense and the leather only partially muffled his screams, but he figured Harker already knew they were there. Suddenly, he realized Danny wasn't at his side. Carefully, he crawled over to the sprawled heap that was his partner. Danny was pale, making his skin stand out in stark contrast to the trickle of blood making it's way down his neck. Steve could see the wound on the back of Danny's skull. It wasn't deep, but Steve was much more worried about internal damage. After ripping another section off of his shirt and bandaging Danny's head, he gently rolled his partner, careful to place Danny's head on his lap.

"Danny?" he whispered as loudly as he dared. "Danny, can you hear me? Come on man, wake up." Not knowing what else to do, Steve rubbed his knuckles over Danny's sternum, earning him a moan of protest and the opening of two unfocused eyes.

"Ughhhh, Steve?"

"Yeah man, you with me?"

"Think so. Ahh, what happened?"

"Looks like we fell through some kind of trap door. I broke my arm and you, my friend, got a nasty bump on your head. How do you feel?"

"My head hurts like a bitch, but other than that I think I'm good."

"Yeah, sure you are. How many fingers am I holding up?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know? It's pitch black in here!" Steve frowned.

"Danny, no it's not. There's candles all along the walls down here. I can see you just fine."

"What? But I can't see anything!" Danny said, sitting up. He immediately regretted the action as it sent a sharp spike of pain through his skull.

"Hey, hey. Easy Danny. Take it slow. Just relax, okay? This is probably just temporary."

"What do you mean?" Danny asked a little breathlessly as he tried to breathe through the pain.

"During hell week a buddy of mine fell on the obstacle course and hit the back of his head. When he woke up, he couldn't see. The doctors on the base said his brain had swollen a little and was pressing on the occipital lobe, causing him to go temporarily blind. He could see again within a couple days." Steve explained.

"Sounds good enough. Can you get Chin or Kono on the radio?"

"Nah, it's being jammed."

"Of course it is. We still got our guns?"

"Yeah, mine's in my holster and yours is right here." Steve said as he handed Danny his gun. It had fallen out of his holster in the fall.

"Thanks. Not that I should be shooting."

"If you have to, just make sure I'm not in the way." Steve joked, but it fell flat. Reluctantly, Danny started to stand, only to waiver and nearly fall over.

"Whoa who whoa. What are you doing, Danno? I can't catch your ass if you fall." Danny laughed at the oddly familiar conversation.

"Look, we stay here, we're sitting ducks. This is Harker's house. Judging by the look of the main floor, he doesn't live up here. No, I think he spends his time down here. This is his domain and you can bet that if we just wait for him like he expects us to, we're going to end up like those poor women he butchered." Steve shrugged, but agreed.

"Alright, we'll take it slow. Here, lean on my good side. You may not be able to see yourself, but you walk like you've had a few." Danny nodded and allowed Steve to hook an arm around his waist. Glancing up once more at they'd fallen through, Steve led them onward. If the house they had seen looked huge, the tunnel system below was even bigger. Steve was almost glad that Danny couldn't see the narrow tunnels, or his claustrophobia would be getting the better of him. Still, Danny wasn't any better off. His gait had been erratic to start with, but as they walked, he became increasingly unbalanced and stumbled frequently. They had agreed on silence to try not to attract Harker's attention, but even so, Danny had never been this quiet. Every few minutes, Steve had to jerk Danny awake, fearing that his friend would slip into a coma. He didn't know how bad the concussion was, but he could guess. Meanwhile, Steve was trying not to pass out himself. The pain in his arm was nearly unbearable as the two jagged ends of bone rubbed together. Steve knew he was bleeding heavily and that he was probably this close to going into shock, but he fought to stay conscious. As Danny began to sag once more and drag his feet, Steve jerked him up.

"You with me buddy?" he asked quietly. Danny blinked tiredly and straightened a little.

"Y-yeah. 'M good. What about you? How's the arm?"

"I'm okay Danny. Don't you worry about me."

"Aww, isn't that sweet?" said an unfamiliar voice behind them. Suddenly, there was a flash of pain in their heads and they knew no more.

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Steve was once again the first to open his eyes. As soon as he realized what had happened to them, his concern for Danny went up a few notches. His own head hurt bad enough, but he couldn't even begin to imagine what Danny was feeling. _Or not feeling..._Steve thought, realizing that two serious head injuries could have killed his friend. He quickly moved over to his friend's limp body to search for a heartbeat. Once he had verified Danny's pulse, he took in their surroundings. they were in a cell of some bars were old and rusted, but they held up to Steve's attempts to break them down. He felt sick when he saw the pile of women's clothing and jewelry on the other side of the room. That combined with the dried blood on the floor told him that this was where Harker had kept the women he had kidnapped. As he watched, Harker entered the room. He wore a broad grin on his face as he clapped slowly.

"Very good, Commander. I have to say, I didn't expect you two to run. All the other's just sat there and waited, but you two….you were smart. Took me two hours to find you and I know this place better than anyone!" Steve said nothing, just continued to glare at Harker. "Silence, well that's new." Harker drawled, pulling a knife out if it's sheath and admiring the blade. "Usually they scream, cry, or beg me for their lives." He whispered in a husky voice. Seeing that his words had no effect on his prisoner, Harker pulled Steve's gun from his waistband and pointed it at him as he unlocked the cell. "Out. Now." He ordered. When Steve looked back at Danny's still form, Harker's smile grew even wider. "Oh, don't worry. I have something _special_ planned for your friend. Now, sit." Harker demanded, pointing to a metal chair in the center of the room. Steve did as he was told, then Harker pressed a button on the counter behind him and set the gun down. Instantly, metal bands looped around Steve's wrists and ankles. Harker laughed as he watched Steve struggle against his bonds. "Like it? My uncle had it made back in the thirties. Back then, the mob ruled these islands. I suppose you can guess what this chair was used for, no?" Harker asked, but Steve maintained his silence. "I will make you beg, Commander. Just like they did. Maybe once you're out of the way, that pretty brunette of yours will see things my way. Catherine was it?"

"Don't you touch her!" Steve growled, rage boiling inside of him.

"Aaah, it speaks!" Harker exclaimed as he traced his knife over Steve's injured arm. Steve bit his lip to suppress the scream of agony building within himself until he tasted blood. As quick as a striking cobra, Harker moved behind Steve and placed the knife at his hairline and applied just enough pressure to make it hurt, but not to draw blood. Not yet. He leaned in close to Steve's ear and in a deadly whisper said, "I will make you beg, Commander."

"Go to hell." Steve spat. Harker shrugged.

"Have it your way." He raised the knife, but before he could make the first cut, there was a deafening crack and Harker fell to the ground, blood pouring from his chest.

"Did I hit him? God, Steve please tell me I hit him." Danny's weak voice asked. Steve laughed.

"Yeah buddy, you got him. Just in time too! Nice shot for a blind guy."

"You're kidding. I actually hit him? God I thought I hit you."

"You saved me, man. Harker's dead."

"Well….that's good." Danny said softly, leaning back against the counter.

"Hey, how you doing, Danno? You okay?"

"Oh just peachy."

"Ok, we'll get help here soon, alright? But right now I need you help. Behind you, six inches from your left elbow is a button. I need you to press that so I can get out of this chair." Danny nodded and after running his hand over the counter a few times, he found the button. Once Steve was free, Danny slid to the ground and closed his eyes. As fast as he could, Steve was at his friend's side.

"Hey, Danny. Stay awake for me man. Come on."

"Y'know," Danny slurred. "I can't see you but I just know that you're invading my personal space." Steve laughed.

"Well, when you stop scaring the shit outta me, we'll talk."

"Control freak." Danny muttered, but it was said with affection. Moments later, there were footsteps echoing down the halls.

"Chin? Kono?" Steve yelled.

"Steve! Thank God." Kono's voice answered. A minute later, they were joined by the rest of their team.

"Jesus you two are a mess." Chin muttered as he and Kono assessed Steve and Danny.

"My arm's broken, compound fracture. He hit his head pretty hard and can't see." Steve provided, making it easy.

"I swear we should just add a few medics to Five-0, just for you two." Kono remarked.

"Speaking of medics," Danny said tiredly. "please tell me they're on their way."

"Yeah, we called them when you guys stopped responding. We heard them right behind us, so they should be here soon." Chin assured.

"Awesome." Danny mumbled, then promptly passed out.

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"You have a face." Danny croaked as soon as he woke up. Steve jumped in surprise, then smiled.

"Hey, you can see!"

"You have a face." Danny repeated.

"Well, that may have something to do with the fact that you've been in a coma for a week." Steve replied.

"Really?"

"Yeah, you done scaring us now?"

"Think so...wait. I missed Christmas? Grace must be so-" but Steve cut him off.

"Grace is just fine. She's not upset at all, just worried about her Danno. Besides, I promised her we could have our own Christmas here at the hospital when you woke up. you up for that?"

"Of course I am!" he replied, his voice still weak and hoarse.

"Why did I even ask? Well let's get you checked out by a doctor first, okay?" An hour later, the doctor had cleared Danny for a small and relaxed celebration, so long as he promised to rest afterward. In that time, Chin had picked up Grace, Steve had sweet talked the nurses into allowing them to bring in Danny's pitiful fake tree, and the presents Danny and Grace had wrapped for each other along with Five-0's presents to one another were placed under said tree. Kamekona provided a traditional Hawaiian Christmas dinner of fried shrimp and shave ice. The night was spent opening gifts, enjoying good food, and spending time with the family the had all come to cherish. Each loners in their own way, this unconventional family they had formed made a Christmas like no other. One they wouldn't change for anything.

******Well, there it is then! Happy (insert applicable holiday or whatever if you don't celebrate here)! I hope yours was as wonderful as mine! We just made it to our destination (my brother's house) where his wife just us that she's pregnant! I'm gonna be an aunt you guys! Yay!**


End file.
